Lentorama 2009: Great(?) Moments in Catholics on Television

May 15, 2005: Bart Simpson wants to become Catholic

After getting expelled from Springfield Elementary for a prank he did not commit, Marge enrolls bart at St. Jerome's Catholic School. He's resistant due to the school's strict discipline, but comes around after he talks with Father Sean (voiced by Liam Neeson), whose less than ideal childhood and comic books about the lives of saints does the trick. When Homer goes to the school to talk to Father Sean, he winds up wanting to convert as well (such is the power of pancake suppers and Bingo).

From there, Marge enlists the help of Reverend Lovejoy and Ned Flanders to bring Bart and Homer back to the one true faith (the Western Branch of American Reform Presbylutheranism). She fears that she'll be in Protestant heaven (full of croquet-playing WASPs) while they'll be in Catholic heaven (full of Irish step dancing and pinatas).

The conflict culminates in a showdown at a Protestant youth festival, where Bart brings peace by noting that Christians should be united by their big stupid similarities, not separated by their small stupid differences. Which, a thousand years later, leads to two sects of Bart-worshipers to go to war over his true message: love and tolerance versus understanding and peace. Perhaps not as unlikely an ending as we'd like to believe.