Another school year is nigh, and in some cases undergraduates have already returned to campus. That being said, I'd like to pass along five handy tips to those of you heading off to college for the first time (or to those of you coming back who may need a refresher).

1. Look both ways before you cross the street. I know this seems obvious. You've made it through your 18-plus years without this being a problem (hopefully). But if I had a dime for every student who nearly became a hood ornament because they were paying more attention to their iPod than oncoming traffic, I'd be writing this from the study of my mansion rather than a cubicle.

Watch the lights, stick close to crosswalks, and pay special attention to cab drivers, as they follow no more than 40 percent of traffic laws at any one time.

For those of you going to school in Boston who may find themselves on Commonwealth Avenue, Beacon Street, or Huntington Avenue, please also give special attention to the Green Line. Their cars do not stop like your mom's SUV. They stop like small trains because, well, they are small trains. If you don't know why they would take longer to stop, please find a physics major to explain it.

2. Save your complaints for something worthwhile. We know. Your room is too small. Your roommate does that thing with his/her hands. The food sucks. We know you have these problems because every student has had the exact same problems.

So get used to your small room, learn to live with your roommate's idosyncracies and take my word for it that dining hall food has come a long way in the last 20 years. When you have something to complain about - your room is taking on water from the bathroom upstairs, or your roommate is doing that thing with his/her hands with someone else while you're in the room - find your RA or similar person.

Oh, and if you're the person who is going to write the school paper talking about how your hometown is so much better than your current location? Put that energy into transfer applications to schools in your hometown. I'm sure they'd love to have you back.

3. Don't get kicked out before classes start. There's always one student who is a little too excited to be at (or back at) school. They get a little high spirited (literally or otherwise), maybe pull a fire alarm as a prank, and the next thing they know they're either looking for a new place to live or a new school entirely.

Please don't be that student. There are no worse phone calls, either from the student or staff perspective, than the one that informs a parent that their child's educational plan has just taken a fairly significant detour.

You'll learn pretty quickly what you can get away with, so give yourself the first couple of weeks where you don't do anything more stupid than normal. That should get you through safely. And if it doesn't, it's destiny.

4. We are not out to get you. When things don't go your way, it's easy to place blame elsewhere. For some students, this becomes a vast conspiracy involving their RA, professors, the financial aid office, various deans and the guy who sorts the mail.

There is some communication between staff when there's a problem. There has to be, otherwise one hand doesn't know what the other is doing and more problems are created. But we don't spend our time telling the campus to jerk you around. We have enough to do already.

5. Get your parents to back off. To say that parents are more involved in a student's college career now than they were, say, 10 years ago is an understatement. The term helicopter parents wasn't coined without reason.

It's hard to get your folks to back off. They're used to doing things for you, and you're probably used to them doing those things. But a major part of going to college is developing the independence that will see you through the rest of your life. You don't have to cut them out completely, just be firm with them when they want to register you for your classes or call the president because they don't like the color of your room's walls. You'll be doing everyone a favor.

That's it. Class dismissed.